Friday, February 12, 2010

This Week in Weird takes us to the sunny shores of the Persian Gulf -- where we will find two very unfortunate Ambassadors.

To begin, please take a look at the picture below. In it, we see Pakistani President Zardari meeting with members of his ambassadorial corps. Pay specific attention to the man immediately right of the President. His name is Mr. Miangul Akbar Zeb, and is a member of the Pakistani Embassy Mission to Canada. Officially, his title is "His Excellency" Akbar Zeb.

Normal right?

WRONG! While in his native Urdu, Akbar Zeb's name (which is Akbar Zeb) translates to "someone with good countenance", in Arabic, "akbar zeb" means "the biggest cock" (Akbar = The Greatest, Zeb = slang for the male genitalia).

Earlier this week, HuffPo reported that the unfortunate Excellency had been barred from becoming Pakistan's Ambassador to Saudi Arabia -- simply because of his NSFW name.

Now, in a delightful twist ...

... His Excellency is fighting back, claiming that the entire story was a hoax!

The fact is, Akbar Zeb was never up for the Saudi job, but his name still means "My junk is bigger than yours".

I guess things could be worse -- as pointed out by one commenter (Angriest_Buddhist) on the Foreign Policy blog:

"It could be worse -- at least it's not 'smallest."
Whether true or not, I think Akbar should rethink any moves to the Persian Gulf after reading this horrible story. If you thought that being named the arabic equivalent of "Thunder Dong" was bad -- imagine if you discovered your wife's bearded, cross-eyed face AFTER the wedding? While you can read the entire story through the link above, how often will my block quotes get to contain the details of a story like this:
After the marriage contract was signed in Dubai, the ambassador tried to kiss his new wife. However, as he removed the veil, he was shocked at what he saw.

"He was absolutely horrified," a guest said. "The bride had a nice personality, but there was a good reason why she was hiding her looks behind a veil."

The unnamed ambassador went straight to court to annul the marriage, claiming his wife was "bearded and cross-eyed", leaving his wife in tears. The groom claims he had been shown pictures of the ugly bride's prettier sister.
Move over Mr. Giant Snaussage, we've got an even more embarrassing Ambassadorial snafu!

And that, my friends, rounds up this week in weird. Check back next week, and send me your crazy finds throughout the week (even if they deal with His Excellency Penis Mightier)!

And now, back to your regularly scheduled D&D Analysis.


NasserQ said...

Well if that doesn't document the dichotomy of the Arab world I don't know what does... Strange places, strange people; yet the more you travel the more you find commonality between all people. Sometimes I worry.

Jeff Schneider said...

Nasser -- so true! The one great commoner all around the world is that we can laugh at everyone... keep the comments coming, its great to hear from my former students!

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